Over the last three or four years God has been teaching me so much about holding my tongue and not pressing my opinion.
I still have far to go, and I still find myself stumbling, but I do believe that with the Lord’s help I am making baby steps in the right direction.
Over the years I’ve learned that whenever I have a question about whether or not I should press my case, or present my case, or even respond to a questionable issue I go to my husband and ask for his opinion on what I want to say. (In fact, I try to ask his opinion about most things. Because 1. I want to know if we are on the same page and, 2. If we are not on the same page, I want to know his view on the issue so that I will know how to respond and not bring him shame by responding out of line.)
Let me tell you that this is NOT easy to do. It is extremely humbling to go to my husband and ask his opinion on an issue and have him come back and say. “Not acceptable” and/or “Don’t say anything” or worse yet, “You are doing it again.”
You are doing it again.
drip, drip, drip...
i.e. Where is your meek and quiet spirit? Why do you have to make your position known? Why is it important that the person understands you? It isn’t important!
Me: But it is. It is!
Mark: No, it really isn’t (important).
You might question why I even ask his opinion if I know that half the time his counsel will be for me to remain silent (and you would think that I’d just learn my lesson and not need to say anything – I am getting there, but still self tries to rear its ugly head). It is because I do not live alone and all I do reflects back on him.
An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones. –Proverbs 12:4
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom. –Proverbs 11:2
To be continued...