Fearlessly Feminine Motherhood

Motherhood is costly.  And it is only natural to try to resist the pain and still reap the benefits.  But it is this very difficulty, surmounted and conquered, that brings the richest rewards.  Anything of worth is costly:  devotion to Christ, a strong marriage, financial responsibility, a life of integrity, and of course, fearlessly feminine mothering.

To be fearlessly feminine means mothering well.  It means being willing to put someone else's needs ahead of your own.  The fearlessly feminine woman stops running from her children.  She develops a deep sense of the value of her hourly sacrifices as a mother. There is no "National Mothers' Union"  she can petition for higher pay or better work conditions.  Yet as she surrenders to the call of motherhood, she fleshes out her answer to the question, "What is truly important in my life; what is of eternal significance?"

Are you struggling with your role as a mother-servant in your home?  Are you resenting your kids?  Are you fearful that life might slip through your fingers?  Recognize your feelings for what they are:  self-centered and unfaithful toward the God who called you to mother.  These emotions are the opposite of what is good and true and pure and kind.  God's purpose for us as his daughters is not freedom from the difficulties in life. His goal is to make us like Christ and, through us, to mark our children with His beauty.  ~Jani Orland

And whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave to all.  For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many. ~Mark 10:43-44

Low & Wise

Perhaps a better woman after all, with chubby children hanging on my neck to keep me low and wise. ~Elizabeth Barrett Browning

More on Motherhood

Motherhood gives us the opportunity to interact with history. Our prayers don’t just become part of protecting our children from harm and from hazards of their own making. With God in control, our prayers for our children can make a mark on our nation. True women, like Hannah (see 1 Samuel 1-2), trust God enough to believe He has great things planned for the babies He has given us - babies we give back to Him for His use, His kingdom, His glory. -Janet Parshall

On Motherhood

Motherhood gives us feelings of fuzzy blankets and baby rattles and toys to line the crib. But motherhood is actually one of God’s refining fires. The reality of motherhood is that it’s a place to learn surrender, letting go, trusting and believing that God is God. -Janet Parshall

On Loan

Our children do not now - nor have they ever - belonged to us. They are God’s. We are simply the happy participants in His lend-lease program. He gives us permission to touch their hearts and minds, to teach them, to write truth on the tablets of their life, to help them know the love of Christ the Savior, to inspire in them a love for God and His Word…and then they go. They’re His, and His alone. -Janet Parshall

Taking Mountains by Their Roots

When God has heard prayer for one thing, faith comes and asks for two things, and when God has given those two things, faith asks for six. Faith can scale the walls of heaven. She is a giant grace. She takes mountains by their roots and puts them on other mountains and so climbs to the throne in confidence with large petitions, knowing that she shall not be refused. Most of us are too slow to go to God. If we have been heard once, we go away instead of coming again and again, and each time with a larger prayer. Make your petitions longer and longer. Ask for ten, and if God gives them, then for a thousand, and keep going until at last you will have enough faith to ask as great a favor as Moses did, “I beseech you, show me your glory.” -Charles Spurgeon

2 CORNTHIANS 4:10

If the world is ever going to see the Resurrection before Jesus returns, it will have to see it in us.

Many of us think often about our witness, but we may think of it in terms of our words or even our lifestyle. Those things are certainly important, even essential parts of our witness. But there’s a dynamic that will do more than any of our words or good behavior can do. It’s the dynamic of visible death and visible life. What does that mean? It means that people must see in us a sacrificial life. They must see self-denial and self-restraint, humility and confession, deference and peace. They must see that the life of Jesus within us costs us a lot. They must see the very attitude that took Jesus to the Cross. Then they must see the power of Jesus working in us. They must see that our life is not something created by our past psychology or present drive, but is given from above. They must see a joy that transcends this world and a peace that will not be bothered by it. They must see the very glory that brought Jesus out of the grave.

The only way to make our Savior known is to embody His death and to embody His life. Live like He lived. Sacrifice like He sacrificed. Enjoy the glory of His resurrection like He did - and does. That’s how He is revealed.    -Chris Tiegreen

Raising Heros

We need to remember our Lord's parable about the bad steward.  He didn't lose his talent, he failed to multiply it.  When the master returned, the steward ran and got the coin he had been given.  We are called to multiply our talents in and through the gift of our children.  Our goal isn't simply to get them into the kingdom, but to raise them to be heroes of the faith.

When we read the Hall of Faith in Hebrews 11, we ought to pray that our children will be in that hall.  As Gregg Harris once wrote, we don't simply want our children to be able to read and understand the great Reformers, we want them to be the great Reformers, for their generation.  It is necessary, however, that we understand what greatness and Reformation are.  That is, our talents will be best multiplied not by raising famous theologians, heroines of renown, sports stars or Christian pop singers.  Our talents will be multiplied if we humbly raise up godly children who will raise up godly children. The greatness isn't in popularity and fame, not even in the "talents," but in the faithfulness. -Denise Sproul

Merry Christmas!

Come and worship, come and worship, Worship Christ, the newborn King! -James Montgomery

The light shineth in the darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not. -John 1:5

A Prayer for Focus - Christ

Jesus, Focus me on You.
As I read and study Your Word - focus me on You.
As I prepare for the day - focus me on You.
As I interact with the people in my life - focus me on You.
As I clean, shop, feed the hungry (in my household), clothe the naked (in my household), kiss ouches, wipe tears, potty train, fold clothes and do the sixth load of laundry and fold it too, clean toilets and the missed aim of a two year old, laugh, play, work, rest, worry, hug, disciple, love, pray - focus me on You.
Throughout this day - whatever it holds and whatever my hands find to do - focus me on YOU.
Not on me.

Amen.

_____________________

Only Christ matters.

Sometimes, when things are going well, we might too easily forget that we have only one sure, immovable, dependable strength-Jesus, who was a baby once and is always and forever God.  That is what holds us and keeps us whether or not we can carry out our traditions.  May our decorations, gifts, festivities-or lack of them-never block our view of Him but always point toward Him.

Only Christ matters.     -Noel Piper

When You are Weary

                      Do the Next Thing

At an old English parsonage down by the sea,
There came in the twilight a message to me.
Its quaint Saxon legend deeply engraven
That, as it seems to me, teaching from heaven.
And all through the hours the quiet words ring,
Like a low inspiration, do the next thing.

Many a questioning, many a fear,
Many a doubt hath its quieting here.
Moment by moment, let down from heaven,
Time, opportunity, and guidance are given.
Fear not tomorrows, child of the King,
Trust them with Jesus, do the next thing.

Do it immediately, do it with prayer;
Do it reliantly, casting all care.
Do it with reverence, tracing His hand,
Who placed it before thee with earnest command.
Stayed on Omnipotence, safe'neath His wing,
Leave all results, do the next thing.

Looking to Jesus, ever serener,
Working or suffering be thy demeanor;
In His dear presence, the rest of His calm,
The light of His countenance, be they psalm,
Strong in His faithfulness, praise and sing.
Then, as He beckons, do the next thing.

              -Author Unknown

Recognizing Our "Sin Alarm"

Our emotions are a warning system God graciously gave us to attract attention to the sin in our hearts. When we’re not experiencing loving feelings toward our husbands, that’s an alarm going off: ding, ding, ding. There may be sin that needs attention. I keep one of Jonathan Edwards resolutions in front of my devotional notebook and seek to make it my personal resolution. He said, "Resolved, whenever my feelings begin to appear in the least out of order, when I am conscious of the least uneasiness within, or the least irregularity without, I will then subject myself to the strictest examination.”Whenever our “sin alarm” (unloving feelings) goes off, we must examine our hearts and repent of any sin we find there. This is how we maintain a tender love toward our husbands. (bolding mine)-from Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother by Carolyn Mahaney

Are you loving your closest neighbors?
My dear husband has often said that we can't really love our next door neighbor (Galatians 5:14) until we first love our closest neighbor - our spouse. He has told me that the order should be something like this: God, husband/wife (our closest and dearest neighbor), children, world.

Voddie Baucham writes this in Family Driven Faith, "It is my relationship with my wife and children that gives my walk with Christ legitimacy....If my wife does not qualify as my neighbor, who does? How could I possibly make an argument for the integrity of my walk with Christ if I can't love my closest neighbors?"

Titus 2 - An Interview with Michelle Duggar

It is not about us. It is about making Him known. Making Christ known. - Michelle Duggar

Amen!

Dear Ladies,

Single, married, mothers of none , mothers of one or two, mothers of many may I encourage you to listen to the following interview with Michelle Duggar. She is a godly, sweet, wise, and precious woman with lots of experience raising children…I guarantee that you will be blessed. Topics range from whether or not she and Jim Bob always wanted a large family to dealing with the difficult times in life.

#14 Ladies' Symposium: An Interview with Michelle Duggar

Michelle’s favorite exhortation for young mothers - Don’t grow weary in well doing. For in due season you will reap if you faint not. … You will rejoice in time to come if you faint not.

P.S. Many of you know that a few weeks ago our sweet baby #6 went to be with the Lord through miscarriage. Going through this process has been horrible and precious at the same time. We thank God for giving us the gift of this child - even for the brief 9 weeks that I carried him/her. God has been so present throughout it all. We mourn, but we rejoice. Blessed be the Name of the Lord. Thank you to all of you who lifted us up in prayer. Know that your prayers were felt and very appreciated. And to those of you who offered to bring us a meal - “God bless you!”.

If you have ever experienced the pain and sorrow of losing a child through miscarriage or later, Doug Phillips message “The Hopeful Theology of Miscarriage” is a beautiful, tough, and wonderful message that will both encourage and challenge you. It is a message that you will not hear from many pulpits, but it is one which should be proclaimed. There may be a few points in this message (like the age of accountability) with which you might disagree, but listen anyway. Plus, did I mention that this is a challenging message? As in it requires thought.

#31 The Hopeful Theology of Miscarriage

“Mom, I just wish I could have seen his face.” - Aaron, age 12

“God is good. God is so good. God is good, but He can stop a baby. But God is so good.” -sung by Bess, age 4, as she played with her dolls.

“Mom, you can still (we can still) have another baby right?” - Asked by all of the children.

“Mom, now we can have all those things that you (and Dad) told us that we would have to give up because of the new baby - vacations, new shoes, clothes, toys. …I still want a baby.” -Bess, age 4

God gives a good gift. -Doug Phillips
Life isn’t just about life it is about death. -Doug Phillips

Oh, Lord, thank you, thank you! for the nine weeks that you gave me. Those weeks were so precious. Thank you. I honestly thought that I would never have the joy of carrying a baby again. What a sweet, precious gift you gave me…I love you Lord. Thank you. I trust you God. Blessed be the name of the Lord. -danielle, age 42

The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot. The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance. - Psalm 16:5-6

Faithful Labor

We, and our children, will certainly change dramatically over the course of our lifetimes. But we are not evolving from ape to man. Instead we are moving from sinners to saints, becoming more and more like Christ. This is what we are striving toward, by God’s mercy and because of His love for us. What brings about this change isn’t evolution, but faithful laboring in obedience, a tool given to us by God, to be used for God’s ends. Our faithful labor includes washing our children with the Word and seeking to daily apply it to all our family’s lives. It includes modeling service to our King. It also includes beholding His body in the church. Then we are helping our children to become what they are meant to be - like Jesus. Then when they see Him as He is on that great day, they will be like Him. -from Tending Your Garden by Denise Sproul

True Faith

We say things like, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me,” and “Trust in the Lord with all your heart.” Then we live and plan like we don’t believe God even exists. We try to set our lives up so everything will be fine even if God doesn’t come through. But true faith means holding nothing back. It means putting every hope in God’s fidelity to His promises. -from Crazy Love by Francis Chan

On Suffering

Being called to suffer is actually a privilege. Each trial is a gift. It’s a chance to know God’s strength and supernatural joy and to show that following him is worth everything. - from Joy a godly woman’s adornment by Lydia Brownback

Joy, joy, sweet, elusive joy

Joy. It is what makes us stand out from the world around us.

Joy is always available to those indwelt by the Holy Spirit, which is why gloominess is a copout.

Joy and Christ-centeredness go hand-in-hand, so if we lack joy more often than we have it might the truth be that we aren’t Christ-centered? Surely, for some of us, it is. Even those of us going through a season of darkness can pursue joy, trusting that God designed us for it. Sooner or later, in Christ, we will find it. The trick for some of us is to change our self-oriented, worldly focus to Christ, and for others it is to take a fresh hold of God’s promises that no matter how dark life seems, he is going to push you out into the light.

These wise (and tough) words are from a small devotional entitled joy a godly woman’s adornment (the title is all lowercase) by Lydia Brownback. I haven’t read very far yet, but so far so worthy. I’m thinking that this is the type of book one needs to give away - and often.

And the title.

Isn’t the title wonderful. It even caught my husband’s eye.

Joy can seem to be so elusive, so easily stolen or lost. How I long to constantly be adorned with joy.

Adorned with it.

Clothed in it.

Crowned by it.

Filled with it.

Do not let your adorning be external...but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with imperishable beauty... -1 Peter 3:3-4

Moodiness, which comes upon me every so often, is my foe. I try to fight it but there are times when I seem to forget that I am indwelt by the Holy Spirit.

There have been times when I’ve thought that I’ve lost my “joy” (as though I own it or can produce it myself). I’ve complained about it. Valleys. But it is at such times (and many others) that my husband is so very good about taking me to task…one of the blessings (or not, depending on my mood) of being married to a godly man who is also a student and teacher of the Word.

A little more from the book…

No matter what we give up for the sake of Christ and knowing God better, joy is going to result. Initially, it might not seem that way. The man in the parable (Matthew 13:44) had to sell all he had in order to buy the field. The time of sale is usually where we are tempted to stop. We find the kingdom of heaven, but we don’t go all out to possess it fully and to let it possess us. We want Jesus but not necessarily costly discipleship. We want a kind heavenly Father, but not a disciplining one. We want our character bettered but not transformed. We want the benefits of Christianity without the cost, a price we must pay if we would go the whole way into the Christian life. … Fence-sitters can’t know the joy of the man in the parable. Holding back is a joy killer. … When we are facing death of self, the costliness of discipleship, we are likely to pull back unless we remember the promise we have been given about how it will all turn out. The man in Jesus’ parable wound up owning the field. And Jesus said that those who lose their lives - all the earthly things they lean on for happiness and security - will find what they have been looking for all along. God will see to that.-from Joy a godly woman’s adornment by Lydia Brownback

O Christ, All thy ways of mercy tend to and end in my delight. Thou didst weep, sorrow, suffer that I might rejoice. For my joy thou hast sent the Comforter, multiplied thy promises, shown me my future happiness, given me a living fountain. Thou are preparing joy for me and me for joy; I pray for joy, wait for joy, long for joy; give me more than I can hold, desire, or think of. Measure out to me my times and degrees of joy, at my work, business, duties. If I weep at night, give me joy in the morning. -from The Valley of Vision/Joy

Lord, adorn me in joy. Amen.

Wise Words from 1655

Parents, your children have souls which God expects you to nourish with at least as much care as you lavish on their physical needs. Who will teach them if not you? No one is surprised to hear that a ship put out to sea without a compass has sunk or run aground. Why should we be surprised to see children wander far from God, when they have received no spiritual direction?

I believe a man calls in question his own Christianity if he does not bother to acquaint his child with God and the way that leads to Him. I will even go so far as to say I have never known a true saint who was not deeply concerned about his child’s relationship with the heavenly Father.

You will give a poor account at the Last Day if all you can say is, ‘Lord, here are my children. I bred them gentlemen and left them wealthy.’ What a mocking witness to your own folly that you would do so much for that which rusts, and nothing for a knowledge of God unto salvation, which endures forever!

Faith will not grow without planting, and will die even where it is planted unless it is watered and fertilized with the Word of God. Atheism, irreligion, and profanity, on the other hand, not only grow without planting, but will not die without forceful plucking up. Indeed, they thrive best in an untended soul - until simple ignorance and disbelief in the child become willful attitudes in the man.

When a child breaks one of God’s commandments, it is his sin; but it is also the father’s if he never taught the child what the commandment of God was. Wicked children become heavy crosses to their parents. When a father or mother must trace the source of wickedness to his or her own neglect in training the child, cross is laid upon cross and the load becomes unbearable. Can there be a greater heartache in this life than to see your own child running full speed toward hell, and know that you were the one who outfitted him for the race? Oh, do your best while they are young and in your constant care, to win them to God and set them on the road to heaven.

Training your children up in the ways of the Lord is no casual suggestion, but a solemn command given to all Christian parents. Your refusal to obey, whether the product of deliberation or neglect, will pay you bitter wages when you stand before the King of kings in judgment.
- passages from The Christian in Complete Armour volume 1 by William Gurnall

No Fear

Of God.

This is strategic territory, because one of the great problems of modern Christians is the ‘shrinking of God' as we have shunned studying His character and greatness and focused on how He can be useful to us. – from Our Covenant with Kids by Dr. Timothy A. Sisemore

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction. –Proverbs 1:7

Not Our Own

The purpose of raising our children is to get them ready for God’s purposes for them in this life. God wants His salvation, love, joy, and peace to be revealed in them wherever they go and whatever they do. We are not to raise our children for hibernation but the revelation of God in their lives. They are arrows that we daily polish, getting them ready for the day when we send them forth to hit the mark for God. – Nancy Campbell (Above Rubies, #74)